MY INTRODUCTION TO TRAUMA

I grew up in Red Hill on a cherry farm before moving to Bayside with an incredibly loving family. .

No violence.


No drugs.


No alcohol abuse.


No screaming matches.


No divorce.

What I now realise was a very safe and privileged upbringing.

Domestic violence was completely foreign to me. I had no understanding of what coercive control, trauma bonding or emotional abuse looked like.

I met my children’s father when I was 25.

2 months later I was pregnant.

4 months later I discovered he was cheating.

10 months later he choked me for the first time.

I became deeply depressed and suicidal.

Looking back now, it still shocks me how quickly everything changed.

How easily I became trapped.


How much I wanted to keep my family together.
And how deeply I loved someone who was hurting me at the same time.

MY INTRODUCTION TO THE HELP AVAILABLE

After we fled, I experienced the good, the bad and the deeply broken parts of the system. .

.Police.


Lawyers.


Courts.


Legal Aid.


Psychologists.


Family services.

I remember sitting in front of an expensive psychologist asking: “How do I keep my daughters safe from their father once the Intervention Order ends? I’m terrified he may harm them.”

Her response was:

“Put them on the pill.”

My girls were 5 and 6 years old.

That moment stayed with me for years.

What I started realising over and over again was this:


many professionals had qualifications but very few truly understood the complexity of domestic violence, trauma, fear, survival mode and the long-term psychological impact it has on women and children.

I often left appointments feeling unheard, unsupported and emotionally alone.

So while navigating court, breaches, parenting and rebuilding our lives, I started studying.

I completed qualifications in Auslan and Counselling and was later accepted into Swinburne University to study a Postgraduate Degree in Family Violence.

I began applying for domestic violence roles and was repeatedly told to hide my lived experience if I wanted to be taken seriously professionally.

But deep down, I knew my lived experience wasn’t something to conceal.

It was the reason I could truly understand women in ways textbooks alone never could.

MY INTRODUCTION TO A NEW DIRECTION

Fast forward to today and that lived experience has become one of my greatest strengths. .

.I’ve mentored graduates through The Orange Door for several years and have been invited into organisations specifically because of the insight my lived experience brings.

I also began working as a domestic violence counsellor.

I loved supporting women through crisis but I realised something important:

I didn’t just want to help women survive.
I wanted to help them rebuild themselves afterwards.

That led me into coaching.

I became a Master Practitioner in Coaching and NLP through the International Coaching Federation because truthfully I realised I still had deeper layers of healing to do myself.

Counselling helped me understand my past.
Coaching helped me change my future.

Ever since my children and I fled I’ve known my purpose was to help women heal, reconnect with themselves and become whole again.

Today, I’m incredibly grateful this has grown into my full-time work alongside my involvement with facilitating well-being workshops with Women's Spirit Project, mentoring work connected to The Orange Door and facilitating my own women’s circles and programs across the Mornington Peninsula.

I now work with women who are ready to heal, rebuild their self-worth, take back their power and move forward with confidence 

So. . how long are you going to keep waiting to put yourself first??

YOU MATTER 💛

'In the spirit of reconciliation Louise Jayne acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of the country
throughout Australia and their connections to the land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their
elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.'

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